The most recommended books about couples

Esther Perel's exploration of the intricate dance between intimacy and desire resonates with many couples who are in long-term relationships, want it to work so desperately, and yet find themselves stuck. This book builds on the concepts of differentiation and attachment styles while inviting readers to embrace a new paradigm of eroticism within committed relationships.

What resonates deeply is Perel's grounded yet unflinching approach to addressing taboo topics and dismantling societal norms. Through her eloquent prose and compelling case studies, she illuminates the path to unlocking erotic intelligence and reigniting passion in long-term partnerships.

One of the most compelling aspects of the psychological or domestic thriller genre is the exploration of the horrors that go on inside the lives of ordinary people and this thriller is no exception.

It’s even called Behind Closed Doors! It’s a great title and perfectly captures the theme of the book – how a seemingly ordinary couple are caught up in a horrifyingly abusive relationship. It’s unsettling from the first chapter and only gets worse.

But like driving past a motorway pile-up, you can’t stop looking, desperately hoping there’s a happy ending in sight.

Composite Creatures centers around a quiet apocalypse called “the greying,” a human disease linked to ecological collapse that’s never described outright but is unmistakenly real. Against this backdrop, the narrator, Norah, enters into an arranged marriage equal parts romantic and practical. The couple takes over the raising of an ovum organi, a bioengineered organism that both functions as a pet and serves another purpose connected to the greying that only becomes apparent near the end of the book. Beyond its slow-burn apocalyptic trappings, this book also has special relevance for me because the ova organi are clearly modeled on cats. While cats themselves are hardly a novelty in science fiction, the way that Hardaker develops the relationship between the artificial critters and their owners/exploiters is especially evocative.

Did you know that it's ok to laugh when you are grieving? Did you know it's ok to cry when you are grieving? I didn't. I thought I had to be strong. I thought I had to behave properly and seriously or else people would assume I didn't really love the people I had lost. Guess what? That's complete nonsense.  With grief, your emotions are all over the place, often at the same time, and that's ok. It's Okay to Laugh: (Crying Is Cool Too) is an amazing book that really helps you recognize that your emotions are not mutually exclusive. In sharing (and laughing) about her own experiences, the author really helped me give myself permission to feel my feelings. To feel happy and sad, sometimes at the same time, and to know that whatever I feel in my grief, it's ok. This book often left me laughing out… show more.

Next Year, For Sure is the story of a long-time couple, Kathryn and Chris, and how they navigate a new challenge when Chris develops an attraction to a woman named Emily.

Much discussed and celebrated when it was published in 2017 as a “polyamory book,” Peterson explores that topic with great nuance, humour, and love, but there’s a lot more going on here.

Every character in the novel is searching for connection and a way not to be lonely—far beyond one romantic partner or more than one, they are looking for meaningful relationships of many sorts with other human beings and I found that their journeys went to some unexpected and fascinating places.

Attachment theory – the theory that humans need to form a close emotional bond with a caregiver early in life to survive and thrive – is near and dear to my heart as a therapist and coach for expectant and new parents. Tatkin is a master of human attachment in adult relationships, having created the PACT (psychobiological approach to couple therapy) training for therapists. The book, written with Hoppe, uses the science behind attachment theory to help couples strengthen their relationship and meet each other’s needs as a couple in order to be the best parents they can be. It offers tried and true ways to nurture your couple bond so you can not only be present for your baby, but also for each other.

Not only is Jancee Dunn wickedly funny, but her real world, practical advice, collected by experts (including my tips in a chapter about organizing your home), will resonate with new and not-so-new mothers everywhere. 

Although my children are now young adults, I remember the white-hot fury Jancee describes about why and how I became an expert on everything, from changing diapers, to scheduling carpools, to filling out the 42 pages of forms required for a teen trip to Australia, even though I worked more hours than my husband. I particularly enjoyed the chapter with advice from an FBI hostage negotiator. Who knew that simply paraphrasing your spouse’s words could work such wonders in diffusing a marital spat?

Neil Strauss is a master storyteller and his book, The Truth, is a captivating follow-up to his controversial best-seller, The Game. In this candid memoir, Strauss takes readers on an emotional journey as he attempts to answer the question of whether monogamy is really for him.

The book begins with Strauss in rehab for sex addiction, a result of the success of his previous book and the world it threw him into. From there, he embarks on a relationship odyssey that leads him into all kinds of experiences from tantra cults to swinger’s clubs and beyond. His humorous and honest writing style had me laughing out loud at times as I read it at the airport and I deeply admire his vulnerability in bearing all.

The Truth is a fun and insightful exploration into relationships and commitment that will leave readers questioning their own beliefs about love and monogamy.… show more.

On to the suburbs of Sydney where three families gather for a backyard barbeque that culminates in epic disaster. Liane Moriarty’s books each have their own flavor but what always makes her writing for me, is the utterly relatable characters. In this story, I felt completely ‘known’ by mother of two, Clementine. Selfish when she knows she shouldn’t be, wracked with guilt over things that simultaneously are and aren’t her fault, letting herself embrace her sexuality only to come up against dire consequences. Liane Moriarty’s famed novel is Big Little Lies but if you’re looking for more of the same best pal characters and unthinkable moral dilemmas, put this one on your list. 

Moving between the steamy heat of Florida and the urban cool of London, this was the most provocative whodunit I’ve ever read. Such an exquisite game of cat and mouse that I felt like I was the protagonist in the book, not the holidaying couples who meet around a pool and become first friends, then adversaries, as they are drawn into a slow-burn murder investigation.

The telling of the story from each of the couple’s point of view when they host their dinner parties back in London is such a clever device—there are so many red herrings and, oh, such trickery!!